Preschool and no judgement

Judah is going to preschool.*cue anxiety* We were lucky enough to find a great Christian preschool only blocks away from where we live. I'm sure he will love it there, he loves being around kids. I on the other hand will probably not pay attention in school all day because Judah will be on my mind. Even though he's only going part time, I still worry about everything. We co-sleep, how will he do during nap time?. We practice sign language, what if they don't know he's asking for more food? My momma bear instinct tell me to stay at home with him and not go to school. I know in the long run we are both benefiting from me going to school full-time, it just doesn't always seem that way. Another reason I am nervous to let him go is because I fear being judged. I don't want others to see me putting him in Preschool a bad thing. There are so many moms that would love to be able to stay at home with their kids, and I have been blessed enough to do so. There has been so many things as a mother I thought I would never do. Not bad things, just things I never planned. I hate to admit that before I became a mom, it was easy for me to judge parents. The mom that gave her child McDonalds for dinner. The little boy still drinking out of a bottle at three. The parents that had their kids with them out for dinner way past their bedtime. It was easy to cast judgement on situations I knew nothing about. As a mom I now know that things don't always go as planned. I feel compassion for the mom who has to work all day and needs a break from cooking dinner. I understand that taking away a kids bottle isn't as easy for every kid. I've dealt with the middle of the Target aisle breakdowns and the fast food for lunch meals. Yesterday I had to bribe Judah with M&Ms to make it through his haircut. Motherhood has taught me to be more compassionate, show mercy, and understand that I don't always understand the situations of others.

Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you.

Mathew 7:1-2

Life as of lately

I haven't posted many things lately on here. I just got a new laptop so it will definitely will be a lot easier to get things posted rather than having to use the family computer. Lately I've just been busy with my little one. It's amazing how many things can change with an infant. I can no longer make decisions without thinking how it will effect Judah. Tasks that used to be simple are no longer simple, and I'm fine with that. He makes life so much more enjoyable.

Even though I have devoted my life to being a stay-at-home-mom/wife, my desire for pursuing an education is still there. It has actually increased since I had Judah. Judah and my future little ones won't always be so little. I plan on homeschooling my children but one day they'll all be young adults and I will no longer be needed as much at home. Going to school right now is tough, but it's important to me. I'm so thankful to have an understanding and supportive husband of my decision to stay in school. It might take me a whole lot longer than I had planned to become a Speech and Language Pathologist but one day I will get there. I'm in the process of getting my AA right now and am only taking 2 night classes so I don't overload myself. It's sometimes discouraging when I do the math and realize how long it really will take until I reach the level of education I'm going for but I'm a little closer every semester to that degree. I'll achieve that goal and I hope that my future children will see that it is possible to reach goals that you have set.